How to Deal with Mama Guilt | Eva Shockey

How to Deal with Mama Guilt

  1. Tony says:

    Well said!

  2. Shasta Danielson says:

    Love this!

  3. Amanda Riffee says:

    Being a mom of 3 very active kids itís so hard to Miss things. I work on an ambulance and work 24 hour shifts. Being gone for a whole day at a time I miss school activities, games etc. I get severe mom guilt from this. But I always try to remind myself that I have to work to provide for them in life. These little people depend on me. Then in the moments when I come home to their sleepy faces and plan fun days at the lake fishing or whatever else they want to do itís all worth it. I have three of the most amazing supportive kids who know how important my job is and just roll with it.

  4. Jaime B says:

    Eva, as a doctor, business owner, and mother…..you hit the nail on the head! Thank you for your words of support, encouragement, and guidance. Mommas helping mommas is so important and you are doing a wonderful job.

  5. Tawni S says:

    All of this is so true! I have two kiddos (2 and 4) and sometimes I just need a break from them. I used to feel guilty about needing that break, then I realized it makes me a better mom after Iíve had a few hours to myself.

  6. Brad A Tarplee says:

    The title says a lot about you. Looks like you stay up all night and write. HaHa. I completely understand the stress of being a working dad. I have custody of my daughter since she was 3 years old and prior to that I was always the main care taker and provider for my daughter Madison! it is a BIG and stressful job!! but I would not change a thing. I love her with all of my heart!! She is now 16 years old, has read your book, ( I was part of your Release Team), loves the outdoors, loves to fish, hunt, ride horses, etc. Madison is going into her sophomore year of high school at Pamlico High School in New Bern North Carolina. She plays Volleyball, Softball, and is in the NJROTC at her high school. She follows all of you stories. Every time we head to Raleigh she wants to stop at Cabela’s and Bass Pro just to see if we can catch you around. HAHA. But anyway being a dad of a busy young lady is very tuff. I am usually up at 3am to go to the gym then at work by 6am. Off at 5pm at school for workouts and practice for Madison home by 7pm( give or take). Homework, Dinner Bed, and start again the next day. But I would not trade any of it. I still work it out to go Duck Hunting for a week each year somewhere in the central flyway with other friends. At first it was tuff leaving her behind. But it was a good break for both of us. Madison just as in this past weekend Graduated from the Leadership Academy at The Citadel and Showed horses at the Feathered Horse Classic At Clemson to qualify for the Worlds Horse Show. (Lot of driving this weekend). Worth ever minute. I love her with all of my heart. Sorry for going on and on. anyway. You are doing a Great job as mommy and wife!! Keep up the Great work. If you or Tim would like to go duck hunting around New Bern NC please feel free to contact me. I know that is not usually what I see you guys hunting. But could have a really good time. Thank You for Everything you do!!
    sincerely,
    Brad A Tarplee

  7. Cindy says:

    Great job!

  8. Caitlin T. says:

    Oh have I been dealing with mom guilt a ton lately! Trying to balance my attention between my oldest daughter (2 1/2 years old) and my 2 1/2 month old baby girl as well as keep up with my business while still dealing with post pregnancy hormones has been rough. Thankfully I get to work from home, but that brings it’s own set of challenges (as you know ?). I’m working on allowing myself to take a little time for myself without feeling guilty. It’s hard to remember that that small amount of time to recharge makes me a better mom and person in general.
    I hope your upcoming life changes with another baby and a new house is a joyous time and that you can give yourself grace as you adjust to your new normal!

  9. Gina says:

    I am a working mom who clearly hasnít figured out my ďBest YesĒ yet! I love ALL of Lysa TerKeursts books.

    God has given us all a light to shin and he also gave us all gifts to work toward a purpose here on earth. Our lights should be like a spotlight to that purpose but I feel like the light that God gave me to shin is like a disco ball sparkling in 18 different directions and Iím unable to find the purpose God gave me to shin directly on and unfortunately that leads me to saying yes to more than I budgeted my time for. Ultimately stealing time from my family and stirring up more guilt.

    I have been working a new job role since my son was 6 months and at first I thought my sadness was from being away from my son so much. After several months of deliberation I found that I am not living my purpose or using the gifts that God gave me which has made me feel not needed and ultimately I drag that sadness home with me.

    I resonate a lot with your article about mom guilt because Iím living every section you posted. I feel guilty for leaving even to stop for an hour after work to have coffee with friends. I feel like Iím robbing my son of quality time. I see now that doing a job I hate is toxic for myself and for my son because he watches my behaviors and as hard as I try to drop it at the door, I canít!

    My son will be 1 year old in 4 days and while I hate leaving him, donít love others teaching him, and feel guilty every second Iím away from him, I know itís not hurting him! My son is showered with love from our family, he is more rounded when others give him a different perspective, and letís be REAL Mama needs a break more often than she can get one!

    Eva, thank you so much for sharing! I look up to you and knowing how realistic and down to earth you are makes it that much more helpful. God always has a plan and I know he sent me to your page so I could get the encouragement your post filled me with! Thank you Eva! Your killin it!

  10. Tanya Stene-Connell says:

    Thank you for everything you said. I have been through the whole Mom guilt thing and dealt with it for years. Between my husband and I we have 7 children, and 8 grandchildren. The youngest of which we are raising. I think the whole Mom guilt thing is way way worse this time around. Not am I old and finding it very hard to keep up with him, hard to work fulltime or very close to it, but now I am finding that my grandson, Jarred, is really starting to feel the separation so my guilt has just ramped right into full anxiety. I find he is begging me to let him come to work with me. The only time he is somewhat happy is when my husband is home during his stretch of 10days off. Im trying to let others help, its just hard to fight your own instincts when they tell you to spend that time with your little one.

  11. Taffy Roberts says:

    I, love reading this blog ! I so appreciate a womans perspective in knowing and listening to what our HEAVENLY Father whispers in our ear. It’s hard to hear that small still voice, but it’s well worth it.
    I also realized for me, that staying home and raising my children was very hard but I knew the Lord called me to do just that. Why? I asked and he spoke very clearly. I struggled with so much quilt. We were so strapped with finances but I just knew what I was to do. PEACE & GRACE soon took over. We settled in and soaked my mommie JOB up! So, I thank you for putting things into a brighter picture for us “guilt feeling mommies”. I know the Lord will lead us all as long as WE ALL continue to listen and ask!
    Now, my oldest is 18, graduated and fixing to be in this big world. THAT, REALLY MAKES ME ANXIOUS AND CRY! QUILT STILL CREEPS IN FOR MANY DIFFERENT REASONS NOW – BUT, I JUST PRAY!
    Thank you & God Bless,
    Taffy Roberts
    (daughter 18 & son 14)

  12. Beth says:

    Needed this. ?

  13. McKenna says:

    I needed to read this ??

  14. Danť says:

    Hi Eva…. I live in South Africa in the karoo (as they call it). We live on a farm, litterly in the middle of nowhere. I’ve been married for six years and we have 2 beautiful girls. The one is 4 years old and the other one 2 and half years old. I wouldn’t trade my home for anything, but living in the middle of nowhere can be very difficult sometimes. A specially with children…. My mom guilt begins with the fact that for 24 hours my two girls are apart of my everyday life. Theres no quick break from them….( I love them with all my heart). But now I feel so guilty about the fact that I just want a few hours from them. I feel like the worst mom. And on top of everything…. People in my husbands family makes me feel even worse as if I can’t look after my own children or that I’m doing a bad job. That’s when my mom guilt kicks in and I start questioning myself. I also started my own business from home. And it’s hard to juggle everything and everyone. We are now in the worst drought in years….. Where every cent counts. And I think with everything going on, it makes it harder to believe in myself. But your words really hit me “You are ENOUGH” And that God made me to be their parent. I just have to trust Him. Thank you for being such a great role model . And thanks again for the wise words.
    Greetings from South Africa

  15. Amy Jo says:

    Love this and needed this right now! Thank you for sharing!!

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